Friday, November 14, 2008

Why I Believe the Catholic Church as Sexist as Wahhabism

Isn't it ironic that the Catholic Church is perfectly willing to excommunicate people who vote for a pro-choice candidate yet say nothing when those same people are sent to the Mideast to fight in what is so obviously a religious war? Ironic, or cynical? A little disingenuous? Hypocritical even. Every little baby is a potential Catholic, so saving the mother where birth is concerned, is out of the question if the fetus or child must die. After all, no one has known this child-to-be except God, and He would be sorely offended if this lapsed or at least jaded mother subjected herself to abortion.

That is the problem with interpretation of supposedly sacred texts, those overly-translated and ideologically perverted sayings of persons who knew someone who knew some sort of messiah, some Joshua guy called the Christ: latter-day devils can twist the original meaning into anything that sounds good to them. One supposes that the Catholic fixation on depriving females of the right to do anything with their bodies they might wish is found early on in the Decalog. But the last time I looked, Reb Yeshua was supposed to be a forgiving person. Maybe that arch woman-hater and latent homosexual, Paul of Tarsus, mistranslated to suit his purposes, and by the time Constantine joined up, the life of the Christ was more myth than legend, a tale not even King James's poets could entangle there are so many contradictions and illogicalities.

How does one "interpret" such a "book"? Going to great lengths about prophets and Gods and such, none of which is capable of scientific examination much less proof, is illogical in the first place. One might as well worship the Easter Bunny or Genghis Khan. (Actually, worshipping the Great Kahn isn't a bad idea, a kind euhemerist Dark Ages version of Ares or Mars.) The infallibility of the Pope (I almost said Ponzi) is unquestioned, which is kind of nice because you don't have to resort to the only God there is: the one between your ears.

I have known corner preachers who've uttered more truth than the average priest. Once, in the Park at Venice Beach (okay, California, not Italy), I ran into a small crowd encircling a young black man who discussed the Bible with anyone interested. At one point, a self-professed born-again youth drew near, holding up his "good book" and insisting that the corner preacher was going to hell because he wasn't himself "born again." (And by the way, just what does that mean? I had enough trouble getting here the first time, and my Mom is dead, so how can I be "born again"? These people find such silly euphemisms.)

The corner preacher asked to see the Bible and it was duly passed to him. Whereupon, he flipped through it to a particular passage one would find meaningful with the Vietnam War going strong at the time and the newspapers full of photos of LBJ hoisting his beagles in the most painful manner, and read: "He who passeth by and meddleth with strife not his own is like one who would take a dog by the ears." The small crowd laughed, getting the joke. But the preacher quickly added: "It's in there! It's IN the book!" (He also located a passage saying that God gave us all the herbs and plants to use as we wish, which the preacher claimed proof positive God wants us all to smoke dope.)

I don't suppose the Church is still extracting the hard-earned shekels to buy loved ones out of purgatory, but it's still a money-making enterprise, complete with accounting department and, at one time at least, their own bank, so they must be raking it in. I should imagine that anyone who believes in such a thing as purgatory must think that the more they put into the collection plate, the less likely the will go to the Other Place. After all, fear of death is the only reason those rascal clerics make their living.

Oh, by the way, when the born again requested his book back from the corner preacher, things got briefly nasty: the born again almost struck the corner preacher, who observed: "There you are. If I don't give it back, you gonna HIT me man! You gonna HIT me!" Something tells me he was pointing up the born again's hypocrisy, believing in a man of peace but failing to turn his own cheek.

Orthodox Islamists believe woman is inferior to man, else why not let her drive a car, go out in public without veiling her hideousness, &c.? But the Catholic Church is just as Medieval and silly. I lament the passing of the late George Carlin, who, in one of his stand up routines, saw it odd that in the Cathedral God makes woman cover their head, but when the go to Synagogue, covering their head is verboten. Carlin wondered if it was really wise to believe in a God who's that arbitrary. Hey, George, they're all the same.